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thelastpostforhim

I wish my tears won't be rolling down again when I blog about this. It's like God who arranged all this. This is the last post that I'm going to mention about him. I promise myself, no more tears. We've undergone everything. We started our first conversation in MSN, that time we were just having purely friendship. I remembered we chatted about all topics. That time I felt glad to find a good friend like him. After some time, we developed into couples that everyone also can predict about it because we were very obviously ambiguous, posting wall post at facebook to each other. Being couples together is always sweet at first. Everyone around me knows my feelings very well because I always tell all my best buddies about our sweet things when there's a free period. Time flies when I'm with him. Sadly, we broke for the first time during October I guess. That time all of us were having PMR, yeah, having Chinese paper. omgholycrapshit. I almost lost all the inspiration and energy to continue with my exam. This frustrated me. During recess time, we used to have lunch together. Seeing him sitting far apart from me, my heart hurt. I spotted he was looking at me, his gaze always makes my heart to skip a beat. That juncture, I knew, we were still missing each other. At 15th of November, my friends and I were having our so-called single party. That day, I was chatting with him all day long. Surprisingly, he courted me for the second time. SECOND TIME. How surprised it is when he said he felt regret about everything. I remembered everything he promised me. They are still etching deeply in my mind. I were still loving him. Without longer consideration, I accepted him for the second time. That time was the best time. I REALLY FEEL LIKE I'M LIVING IN HEAVEN. You know what? That time, we went for Genting trip. Omg, how sweet were those memories. We were like sticky candies, sticking with each other throughout the trip. I remembered I was a noob bowling player, he taught me bowling. We played everything together in Theme Park. My friends all knew, I was very in love with this guy. When I didn't dare to play the flying coaster, he accompanied me not to play too. He consoled me when I was feeling scared to play the Space Shot. We had hot pot together with a bunch of good friends too. I felt that we were like a family. I missed every freaking moment. Talking about BBQ party, you guys know about it if you read my blog. I was having stomach pain that time, he was non-stop soothing me, reminding me to drink more water. That time was my first time knowing the feeling of being cared by a boy. Till one month anniversary, we enjoyed being together. I thought that we were meant to be. I thought you said before, God had never sent a wrong person for me, you're perfect baby, I love you. Because of holidays, we seldom meet each other. But true love won't be affected by distance right? Yesterday, it was really bad to know that he requested to break with me. I felt really hurt, deeply in my heart. Having a broken heart is like having broken ribs. It cannot be seen but every time I breathe, it hurts. But what can I do. You said that we didn't suit each other. That time, I was telling you all about our memories but you didn't care. We've been through everything and you said that we didn't suit each other. My heart beat almost stopped. Tears can't stop flowing down my spines. I won't deny that I was really happy with us and that I loved every second we spent together, but things start for a reason and they end for a reason too. And now, I'm trying to erase you from my life. I know it might be a tough job, but since every failed relationship is a chapter learned from the book of love. Thanks for giving me a nice chapter these days. Looking forward is the thing I'm gonna do now. I wrote this post with my heart and soul. Readers, at least I've been loved. How about you? (:

JESS.

14 comments

  1. Nothing is easy in love. From letting your beloved one to conquer your heart, till putting him or her off. It ain't easy. But, at least, you did have a lovely memory, at least, you have learnt something else. Cheer up, tomorrow is still ahead, don't cover yourself too long till you miss something else in your life, which is more precious and important. Take care.

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  2. Cheer up jess! New love new love x)

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  3. Anonymous: You're right. Heart breaking is just a small matter. I should always look forward. (:
    Baojie: Thanks (:
    Jovi: It needs time too. ):

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  4. tomorrow is better, cheer up.... there's so much things for u to care about,friends fanilies...... what happened was now past, think more about future and look forward ,u still have a long path to go. He was just a candy on your way, sweet to enjoy, but sorrow comes when it finished.
    As the chinese song "fen shou kuai le" goes, u can find a better man, who is really a man that can cover u in his embrace forever , and that need alot of patience and hard deeds to find on your life path....
    I dunno whether what i said are useful or meaningful, we as your friends are just hoping u back to the normal crazy jesss XD
    Wish you good luck !!

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  5. S.M: LOL. ARE YOU SAMSON MAH? :X

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  6. The next one will be better!
    Don't be sad. I can't do anything,just hope that you will recover! (:

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  7. You can live without him! Jiayouss!

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  8. well , at least you know you did your best for him before . no regrets kayy :) smile and cheer !
    xoxo Mabel

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  9. Hey stay strong & positive! U did your very best already, stop crying ♥

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  10. Stay strong girl! Be tough and don't cry for him anymore!

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  11. Mabel: Yeah,thank you so much. (:
    Cassy: haha, I'm alright dear! Thanks!
    Anonymous: Okay! Thanks!

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  12. I really must say..It was annoying to read this post ,at first.but then i felt your emotions.It was childish and yet..it reminds me of so many things.Things that adults have long forgotten..You are young ,plenty of opportunities.Only thing u need to remember is this feeling ,something u can look for in your future boyfriend.good luck.

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  13. Oh thanks adult for this advice, the most important is I've learned a lesson after all this. ;)

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