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Trouble that troubles me.

I suddenly have so many thoughts on my mind. Perhaps it's because something happened between my mum and I. We both are like sisters, we go shopping together, hunt for nice food together, chit-chat like friends together and argue like best friends. But as days go by, I realized that she's somehow over-protecting me. I know, she wants to protect me from being a bad girl or what. She doesn't want my results to be deteriorated.

Recently, she is like banning me from going out. That day, I planned to watch a movie with my dad in Mid Valley at night but he exclaimed that he couldn't manage to come back from work on time. Afterwards, I asked my mum to watch it with me. She began to give me excuses like, the movie would end very late, by the time, the place would be very dangerous because many people left the place. I don't think there are only two of us to watch the movie, how about those people who watches movies during midnight? I gave her all my supportive reasons but she still refused to listen to it. Here, an argument happened between us. In the end, I was the loser. Okay, I should say I will never be the winner if the argument happened between MUM and I. Okay, I was forced to stay at home and waste the premiere movie screening ticket.

Another day, which is today, we were quite good this morning. In the afternoon, Qian asked me to go Mid Valley with her together because she wanted to buy a new dress. But the matter is nobody can fetch us back unless we take the KTM back. Guess what? My mum gave me the same excuses. She began her fussiness. I told her exactly that we will take the KTM to reach my house. I didn't want to lie to her that somebody would fetch us back. There she goes, saying vehemently that KTM is very dangerous and so on. Then I asked her whether she can fetch us back, she refused. Okay, Qian and I were trying to be independent, but this plan was rejected. But then she didn't want to fetch us back? So? What can we do? Today is the one and only holiday in September. I just want to go out for a walk and will be back before 6pm! Mummy doesn't want to go out, that's why I plan to go out with my friends.

As a result, another argument burst between us again. I know, she cares for me so much, she is worried of me. But I'm sick of this feeling. I'm like a toy, a toy who only needs to study very hard and pass my exam with flying colours, a toy who has NO RIGHTS. Actually, I don't blame her for caring me too much or what. I just want her to listen to my heart sometimes. I don't want to start a fight with her purposely. I just wanna fight for my rights.

Because I'm grounded, I've no choice but to STUDY in my house. I NEED to satisfy her. I NEED to obey her. I NEED to become a perfect straight A's student. BECAUSE I KNOW, SHE WANTS ALL THIS. She wants me to become a really good daughter who doesn't TALK BACK when she says anything.
To mummy,
I'm sixteen years old mum. Don't be a worrywart as I can see wrinkles growing on your forehead. I'm not turning bad, seriously, I'm still the old me but one thing I might change is, my thoughts. I won't think of doing bad things but only the things I feel right. I swear I will always voice out my own thoughts to you next time okay? Be ready to be my listener, just like last time, how we used to be? All my friends are usually really envious of the relationship between you and me. I'm sad. I don't want my tears rolling down again. I'm sorry.

I know you love me mum because I love you too.

4 comments

  1. bu yao sad... as u say... your mom is worried bout u... y dont u just stand on her shoes and think the same way? =) mom is always right... haha.. I have a same mother as u too...xP

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  2. I've been thru your age. We tend to say that we understand we know. At the end of the day, we never understand their worrisome. You'll get your freedom soon. You're only 16 btw. Very young =)

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  3. hmmm. you should be glad that your mum cares about you. compare to those parents that busy of work and no time to care about them?
    and you are only 16 my dear, what else can you expect?
    but ofcourse, maybe you could show her you are independent enough and able to really take good care of urself, den maybe she wont be too worried. =)

    ReplyDelete

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