The Debt To Yourself

Dress from The Wonder Page 

Come to think about yourself, are you.....

happy to be who you are now?

proud of your own achievements?

...or are you...

feeling inferior to your peers?

feeling that you're fat, stupid, short, and just a mess?

taking it upon yourself whenever things go wrong?

feeling incapable?

Are you ever proud to be yourself? 

And why am I asking so many questions?

It's been a long while now, since I first realised that a lot of people find it difficult to stand before the mirror and say "I'm awesome.". Self-esteem withers yellow, confidence becomes a feat; and confidence outside the window are deemed "facades" of a weeping soul.

Self-esteem is the evaluation of your own self-worth, the opinion of how you think of yourself as a whole. It is an unconscious calculation of yourself in equations built up with the addition of your abilities and values picked up along the walk of life.

Have you ever asked yourself "Why am I so useless?" when you are incapable of doing something?

Have helplessness and despair once held you by the hand and walked you down the pavements of a world which can actually happen to be just perfect - without you?

Have you ever looked down on yourself; allowing shrouds of grey negativity to slowly engulf you into its blank, endless void?

 "Why am I born like this?"

"Why am I just never smart enough?"

It's okay to feel like that once in a while. It's okay, you know. It's completely fine that you may feel weak and get tossed around by negative thoughts sometimes. But please, never let them hold you back from embracing life. Never let them take you away, from you.

Heads up. The game is on. Move.

Our self-esteem grows as we do, long before we learn what "growing" means at all. It's a benchmark of our growth. This benchmark only stretches further as you, taking one step at a time, find reasons to believe in yourself and humbly admit your worth. Many people start to experience low self-esteem when they fail to see their potential to make a change in the world, and thus, began degrading themselves and disintegrating their walls of self-esteem.

With high self-esteem, you can discover more about yourself, and the reasons to love yourself more come ever so effortlessly.

BUT HOW? 

Undoubtedly, we will feel glad and flattered whenever we are praised. It's like a dose of Confidence Booster injected right into the heart. However, that's only the external factor that makes us "happy."

Being genuinely happy comes from within.
Your happiness should not depend on the approval of others.

There's nothing wrong with making others happy, we gotta admit that it's also a happiness to paint smileys on people's faces too. But whenever you do, please do it out of plain sincerity - strictly nothing more, and nothing less.

SELF-ACCEPTANCE: Your first KEY to SELF-ESTEEM. 
Very much of self-acceptance comprises of a rational extent of your belief in your capabilities, and the understanding of the positive aspects of your personality. Never forget to acknowledge your weaknesses and accept them; they are, and always will be our best teacher.

One question:
If we can't find a way to love ourselves, how are we going to love people?

 We don't shade Instagram filters over our imperfections, no. Life doesn't work like that. We are human beings and only human beings; says whoever we are supposed to be perfect? Don't strive for absolute perfection, it may just be pointless in the end. Do strive instead, for happiness. To be honest, I had been complaining a lot about myself and my life sometime ago, because a lot of things happened and inferiority ignorantly rammed right through my defenses.

But I have came to realise, that complaining about my scars has never bettered my situation at all, no, not even half a bit. On the contrary, I was only sitting on a smiling portrait on my own - with a brush in hand - painting my complexion with shades of shadows. Complaints even dragged the caring people around me right down into the fiery pit of agony, fueled by nothing else but my own negativity.

I clearly understand, now, that everyone likes to be with someone who is more cheerful and positive most of the times; rather than a person who sees no light, but only the burnt ashes right beneath the glorious bonfire.

It's okay if you grumble sometimes, but don't be a grumpy person ALL THE TIME. Don't make it a habit. Don't expect everyone to enjoy that exercise of negativity. Stop complaining about how life is unfair to you. Stop behaving as if the world is indebted to you.

...'cause nothing in the world owes anything to you, not happiness, not luxury, not comfort;

Nothing. You owe it all to yourself.